Thursday, May 04, 2006

ETC: Is It International "I Lost a Bet" Day?

Now that I've marginally returned to work outside the home, I find myself out in the great big world without young Master Sam a lot more. Without him to focus my attention on, I've been really noticing my surroundings for the first time in over a year. And I don't know if I was just spectacularly unobservant before, but my little sector of the universe has gotten a fair bit weirder, fashion-wise, since I last paused to look around.

For starters, when did conference lanyards (you know, those fat shoelace-y things you use to wear your nametag around your neck) become au courant for the troubled and the elderly? I first noticed this yesterday, when I saw an elderly woman on the bus wearing one -- snappily emblazoned with the sentiment "Jesus is Lord" -- to carry her bus pass. Then, later in the same day, I saw a rocker-ish chick wearing one (sans inspirational message) to carry her keys. And a short while later, I saw a troubled-seeming middle-aged man using one, but I couldn't make out what he was carrying and it seemed imprudent to investigate.

Also seen yesterday:
  1. Woman walking down the street ahead of me using a patio umbrella in lieu of a parasol to fend off the sun.
  2. Smelly white guy with big dreads (commonly known as "hippies") playing bongos. Given where I live, this usually wouldn't be comment-worthy, but he was doing it on the bus. The 8:45 am bus. I support the arts and all, but that's just too damn early for bongos.
  3. Otherwise normally dressed guy wearing a colourful court jester hat, complete with jingles. His demeanor indicates that he is totally unaware of his headgear.
  4. The previous three individuals are almost completely obliterated from my visual memory by the sight of a woman wearing pantaloons, the ruffles of which are fluttering out from beneath those cursed "formal shorts." She is also wearing a poncho. And legwarmers. And a bicycle helmet.
Seriously, was yesterday International "I Lost a Bet" Day? I mean, as someone whose wardrobe contains only three colours, two of those colours being grey and brown, I have as much respect and admiration for the fashion forward as anyone, but is there no limit any more?

Anyway. So. Yes, I've returned to work, in a manner of speaking. It's not terribly challenging work these days, I'm afraid, so I still find myself with a fair amount of free time with which not to cook or do housework. From time to time I feel guilty about this, and when this happens, what I like to do is start another blog. This time, it's a co-effort with my main man, Rusty. It's called Vidiotbox, and the premise is this:

We all know there are a gazillion funny, weird little videos online, but unfortunately there are a pangazillion crappy videos that make it hard to find the good ones. Who has time to sort through this mess? We do! So every morning we serve up one lovingly hand-selected video for you to enjoy. No fuss, no muss. You're welcome very much.

Feel free to poke your nose in the door and check out our already burgeoning archive (if a dozen posts can be called a "burgeoning archive," which I've decided it can), including today's post, which is my new favourite music video.


swatcher, polish-ranger said...

My boy just moved out here from Ontario and comments on the weird Vancouverites everyday. Apparently there aren't weird people out East. Who knew?!

swatcher, polish-ranger said...

PS. Whatever happened to the "worst date" contest?

Essy said...

Inspired by your unbookening, I decided to have one of my own.

Um... yeah.

Eventually, I revised my rule-set to 'Look, at the very least cut down to only one copy of any given book' and I was still having a hard time getting rid of anything.

From my entire collection I managed to remove maybe thirty books total. [Photo evidence]

I fail.

(And for those of you wondering about the photo, one of the HP's is in Latin, because I'm an enormous nerd and the other is a first edition, because I hope to make my ebay fortune someday.

And I'm probably never going to read any of those Cornwell's thanks to Sars putting me off...)

Griffin said...

Recommendation for VidiotBox: (great name, by the way)

"Rusty the Narcoleptic Daschund"

My family traditionally has weiner dogs for family pets, making this particular video even funnier.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I've been loving vidiotbox for days now. I shoulda known it was Dopperlganger and Rusty making it happen. From Vancouver! My home town!

And apparently my heart is red and alive.

Anonymous said...

Yesterday was warm here...girls are showin' it off. To wit:
gold lame sandals w/3-inch heel
white denim cutoff short short skirt
tube top

All this, for being at community college! I felt like I was in my own private circle of hell.

Also, one word: gauchos. Brrrr, I hate those stupid pants.

Unknown said...

You saw Chloe Sevigny in a bicycle helment and pantaloons? (It couldn't have been anyone else on the planet, God forbid!) Quick alert the Go Fug Yourself girls!

Anonymous said...

I saw a woman today in knit gaucho pants that were entirely too tight (as if the mere fact that they were gaucho pants wasn't bad enough). They created a horrible cameltoe in the front AND THE BACK. I didn't know that was possible.

Tammy said...

Courtney, whatever happened to the "worst date" contest is that I totally forgot about it yet again until I read your post. This type of lapse in memory is almost show-off-y in its egregiousness. I blame motherhood. For more background, read question #3 here. So now I remember, and I'm going to try really, really hard to get some closure on that contest, I swear to god.

Essy... you're aware that word "unbookening" has "un" at the beginning of it? As in, "to remove"? There's something very wrong with that picture. For starters, it should be much larger so I can read the titles on the spines.

Thanks for the Vidiotbox props, everyone. This is where I put on my pretentious Hollywood asshat, er, hat and say that Rusty and I have been dying to do a project together for ages and we're both thrilled to have gotten the chance to work with each other.

Oh, and Griffin, I am totally looking up "Rusty the Narcoleptic Daschund" right after I write this.

Gina, I TOTALLY thought to myself at the time, "Oh man, where's my camera. This is a classic Random Fug."

And Jag, I think "knit gaucho pants" = "short slacks." And now I must go and be haunted by the mental picture of posterior cameltoe. Why, lord, why?

Anonymous said...

conference lanyards are the big thing among the grade school set as well. its how they carry their tamagotchis. and its weird.

now i will go take a boo at your world wide web story page...

Tammy said...

Well, if you're carrying a tamagotchi, a lanyard is just common sense. I saw another random strange person wearing a lanyard today (minus the tamagotchi). Are they just handing them out in the downtown eastside?

Anonymous said...

We must live in the same hood, as I saw person #3, and his utter facial disagreement with his hat was striking. And, unfortunately, here it is apparently never to early to form a drum circle or spot.
p.s. dig your reviews

landismom said...

I'm dying to know--what's the third color?

Anonymous said...

I use a lanyard all the time to carry my keys for work. If I don't then I'm always leaving them behind and locking myself out of rooms. They are very useful, but I have to say that I never wear it out in public - that's just weird.

And maybe they are just handing them out downtown... I was handed one in downtown Toronto a few weeks ago, so maybe Vancouver is doing the same thing.

Tammy said...

Heheh, Robin. "We're cleaning up this city... one lanyard at a time!"

Okay, maybe that was just funny to me.

Landismom, I'm glad you asked. The third colour is -- wait for it -- vibrant, life-affirming navy. Unless it's summer, in which case the third colour is probably white. Woo!