WEB: Retro Spam

Thank god this important email found its way to someone with my keen business acumen:

Good day,

How are you & your family?

I want to use this opportunity to introduce my self to you.

I am Lorens Kwame, the son of Mr RICHARD ANDERSON (formal Director of Gold and Diamond Resources & Cocoa) who was killed by rebels in my country during the war. Before his death, he deposited a trunk box contain 2.8 Millions Dollars in one of the Security company here & declared it as a family treasure and African Art for security reason.

Due to the political crisis here now I want you to assist me to claim this fund as the next of kin & also to invest this fund in your country on a profitable area to avoid loosing the fund to the rebels here because of the instability in this country. I need your assistance because I can't handle the money properly myself due to my age & I need someone who has experience in business so that the money will be invest on profitable investment. I want you to show your interest immediately you received this message by contacting me for this legal transaction. After the successful transfer of this fund to your country, you will take 25% of the total amount of the money for your assistance & expenses during the transfer of this fund while the remaining 75% will be for the investment & will be manage by you on my behalf in your country, then I can process my travelling documents to meet you in your country. This transaction is 100% risk free.

So contact me immediately through this email address or the telephone number below and also forward me your full name, address and your telephone as well as your international passport photocopy or your Identity Card which I will submit to the security company for the release of the consignment. Due to my age, that is why I need your assistance . As soon as the consignment release from the security company, the fund will be transferred to your country through banking system so therefore do not hesitate to provide an account for the transfer.

I need your urgent response towards this matter. My phone number is 00225 0792 0504 while I am waiting for your call.

Ah, there's no school like the old school. Or is there? Spam kicks it nu $kool over at defective yeti.