Things my toddler has said in public that were hard to explain to strangers (numbers 112 through 116):
"When Puck grows up, he will turn into a manul." "Bring me the axe!" "My bear likes to eat hagfish and tuataras." "If I don't get some, I think I'm gonna die." "Po!"
Restlessly, I walk around all the time thinking "My toddler is smarter than me. I don't stand a chance in ten years."
Griffin, I debated with -- and decided against -- including some strange ideas that Sam has about Mummy's penis. The internet doesn't need to know these things.
Ha! Rebecca, you got the "Alligator Pie" reference! The "axe" thing is from the ending of the version of "Jack and the Beanstalk" we tell. Sam also has a habit of saying the entire "Fee fi fo fum" rhyme in public, which is almost equally disconcerting.
Wow, I was totally going to the Joan Crawford/Mommie Dearest place with the axe item instead. Which would be completely hilarious, and utterly deeply wrong, coming from a toddler.
Well, gee. I thought the "axe" thing was qouting "Mommie Dearest", and that "If I don't get some, I think I'm gonna die" was from "America's Next Top Model", Cycle 2.
I obviously need to start taking cultural advice from toddlers.
Neil ran into Sam today and Sam completely ignored him (as toddlers in strollers often do) until Neil left and said 'bye Sam!' to which he replied 'bye Po!'...
10 comments:
So cute! And I think your toddler seems to be more articulate than me.
At least he started telling strangers that "I came out of my mommy's vagina," as my 3 year old niece has a habit of doing...
#115 is from a Dennis Lee poem, so it's not all that strange. However, the axe one had me gasping!
Restlessly, I walk around all the time thinking "My toddler is smarter than me. I don't stand a chance in ten years."
Griffin, I debated with -- and decided against -- including some strange ideas that Sam has about Mummy's penis. The internet doesn't need to know these things.
Ha! Rebecca, you got the "Alligator Pie" reference! The "axe" thing is from the ending of the version of "Jack and the Beanstalk" we tell. Sam also has a habit of saying the entire "Fee fi fo fum" rhyme in public, which is almost equally disconcerting.
Wow, I was totally going to the Joan Crawford/Mommie Dearest place with the axe item instead. Which would be completely hilarious, and utterly deeply wrong, coming from a toddler.
Well, gee. I thought the "axe" thing was qouting "Mommie Dearest", and that "If I don't get some, I think I'm gonna die" was from "America's Next Top Model", Cycle 2.
I obviously need to start taking cultural advice from toddlers.
"If I don't get some, I think I'm gonna die."
They start so young these days.
Neil ran into Sam today and Sam completely ignored him (as toddlers in strollers often do) until Neil left and said 'bye Sam!' to which he replied 'bye Po!'...
That's one funny, quirky kid you got there!
AM
Hah! Last week, my daughter said, "Mom, I forget what sexy means" to me. In the supermarket.
A future writer no doubt! :)
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